Thursday, 15 December 2011

The night before Christmas

The night before Christmas
a special Christmastime tale

Duane and Sharon were preparing to go home, it had been a fun Schoolies week.

It was great to be away by themselves and get up to a bit of harmless mischief.

Fart the third planet in the Troll solar system had always been a favourite get-a-way spot. It never got boring taking the run-a-round down to the surface and buzz some lonesome vehicle or campers in the desert, wilderness or any isolated place for that matter and then betting how long it took to make it onto a news broadcast.

Duane’s personal favourite was doing “wheelies" in the wheat and barley fields whereas Sharon loved chipping off large pieces off the ice-flows to see how far they had travelled next time she visited. All round Fart was a great holiday destination, the people were backward but they had  great imaginations.

Sharon prepared the ship for take off; she manoeuvred the vessel over the Northern Pole to hide the tiny but traceable accelerator blast. Duane sat down next to her.

“OK everything’s secured let’s go” He said

“Roger that.  Initiating preliminary vacuum thrust….now, hang on what’s that?”

Shannon turned to Duane as the vacuum engine started then died interrupted momentarily by a very loud clunking sound .

“Sounds like something got sucked in to the drive, probably one of those old satellites not on the chart " explained Sharon.

“Let’s have a look-see” replied Duane.

They both unbuckled and went to the back of the ship. Duane opened up the inspection panel that revealed the drive.

“Awww gross” he said in disgust

“Give me a look” Sharon said pushing him out of the way.

Oh yuck” she said. The vacuum drive was clogged with fur, antlers and twisted metal, tracers of toys and red cloth were everywhere. Intermingled within  all this mess were traces of meat and blood.

“Oh Shit , you know what this means don’t you? Sharron said looking back towards Duane.

“Yep” he replied “ Dad is going to be so pissed, I’m going to have to use his SAAA card and get a tow. That’s going to cost a bit”

“Oh well you make the call I’m going to carve my initials in that lump of ice the locals call Greenland”