Saturday, 31 December 2011

Is it a coincidence I believe in synchronicity?


Is it a coincidence I believe in synchronicity?

“I get up early in the morning
no matter how disappointed I was
with the day before
it feels new”

Mark Everett (E)
From the EELS Album

The above are lines from one of my favourite songs by songwriter Mark Everett from the Eels. I never knew how much I believed the sentiment expressed in those lines until I heard them, maybe I grasped the concept so long ago that I needed it sung to me for it to come to my realisation.
Mr Everett (or E as he is commonly known) has this effect on me with a lot of the songs he writes. Coincidently the song above explains how as he gets older Mark Everett is more acceptable of the person he has become and how he now understands the actions of his deceased father and forgives him for their strained relationship when he was younger.
Coincidently this is something that happened in my own life and I can relate to.
It’s funny I chose to play this album on the long drive to work recently because I had just finished a book I picked up by chance in a bargain book barn titled The Selected works of TS Spivet
It is about a 12 year old prodigy who creates maps to explain all manner of things, both scientific and those of the everyday who wins an award from the Smithsonian Institute, who believe he is many years older.
TS Spivit lives in Montana and is the product of Scientist Mother and a Cowboy Father.
TS Spivet is very distant from his father and believes he does not understand or even love him very much because of his academic bent and runs away to Washington without telling his family to accept the award believing they wouldn’t let him or even believe he had won it.
TS Spivet hitches a ride on a train and during the long trip he awakens to find himself in void that he can’t explain with no sound or sense of place. This reminds him of an essay he discovered in a Library back home that explained worm holes existing in the American Midwest and were responsible for many disappearances during the ages. When explaining the worm hole theory TS Spivets (who is probably one of the few 12 year olds in the world who could understand such a theory) refers to Hugh Everett 111 who first theorized about the Many Worlds concept which the worm holes refer to. Coincidently Hugh Everett 111 a giant in the Quantum Physics field is Mark Everett’s father.
This theory was also the topic of one of my favourite authors Michael Crichton , himself a child prodigy who wrote for the New York Times at the age of 14.
In his techno thriller novel Timeline Crichton uses the same theory to explain how people go back in history but not time because the move to dimensions that are infinitesimal different to our universe and thus people can come back with out disturbing current history.
TS Spivet doesn’t disappear into the worm hole, he wakes up and finds himself in a huge rail switch yards in Chicago, coincidently where Michael Crichton was born,
TS Spivet eventually gets to Washington and receives his award, he is however used by ambitious bureaucrats who try to hijack his fame.
TS Spivet’s father meanwhile has driven half way across America to rescue TS and goes as far as storming into the Capitol Building to find his son.
TS Spivet realises his father loves him unconditionally – his love was expressed in actions rather than words.
I believe all parents’ love their children unconditionally, I know I do, others just have a very hard time showing it.
Mark Everett eventually found out his father did and wrote a wonderful song about it.
I have a clear recollection of the day I first time I heard the song because it was the day my divorce became final and on the way home from the courthouse I went into a record shop to buy something to cheer me up. I didn’t even know a new Eels album was due out and the man behind the counter said it had only arrived that morning. I saw it as a good sign, on arriving home I found an envelope with a cheque in it , payment for a story I had submitted. These events led me to start writing again.
I believe Michael Crichton received lots of cheques in the mail in his life but they are no use to him now because he died several years ago of cancer, same as my dad.
He lived a full and rewarding life and I believe my dad did too.
I still wake up every morning feeling as if every day is new but now I am more aware of it and still believe my dad did great things and I hope my children think the same when they get older hopefully with out all the bullshit that clouded it like Mark Everett TS Spivet and I had to endure.

Monday, 19 December 2011


Merry Christmas to my regular readers
Let's meet up next year for more of the same.

Thursday, 15 December 2011

The night before Christmas

The night before Christmas
a special Christmastime tale

Duane and Sharon were preparing to go home, it had been a fun Schoolies week.

It was great to be away by themselves and get up to a bit of harmless mischief.

Fart the third planet in the Troll solar system had always been a favourite get-a-way spot. It never got boring taking the run-a-round down to the surface and buzz some lonesome vehicle or campers in the desert, wilderness or any isolated place for that matter and then betting how long it took to make it onto a news broadcast.

Duane’s personal favourite was doing “wheelies" in the wheat and barley fields whereas Sharon loved chipping off large pieces off the ice-flows to see how far they had travelled next time she visited. All round Fart was a great holiday destination, the people were backward but they had  great imaginations.

Sharon prepared the ship for take off; she manoeuvred the vessel over the Northern Pole to hide the tiny but traceable accelerator blast. Duane sat down next to her.

“OK everything’s secured let’s go” He said

“Roger that.  Initiating preliminary vacuum thrust….now, hang on what’s that?”

Shannon turned to Duane as the vacuum engine started then died interrupted momentarily by a very loud clunking sound .

“Sounds like something got sucked in to the drive, probably one of those old satellites not on the chart " explained Sharon.

“Let’s have a look-see” replied Duane.

They both unbuckled and went to the back of the ship. Duane opened up the inspection panel that revealed the drive.

“Awww gross” he said in disgust

“Give me a look” Sharon said pushing him out of the way.

Oh yuck” she said. The vacuum drive was clogged with fur, antlers and twisted metal, tracers of toys and red cloth were everywhere. Intermingled within  all this mess were traces of meat and blood.

“Oh Shit , you know what this means don’t you? Sharron said looking back towards Duane.

“Yep” he replied “ Dad is going to be so pissed, I’m going to have to use his SAAA card and get a tow. That’s going to cost a bit”

“Oh well you make the call I’m going to carve my initials in that lump of ice the locals call Greenland”

Thursday, 8 December 2011

Vampaids and the decline of the People in the 21st Century

Vampaids and the decline of the People in the 21st Century
Something different,amazing art by the uber talented Scott Robinson

Vampire are a dying breed and it was the humans who were responsible.
The same men and women _the People_ used to herd like cattle for their meat.
Mankind got smart and sneaky.

Do really think AIDS was an accident?

Sure it got out of hand but they seemed to think the attrition rate was acceptable to be rid of the Vampires.
You see Vampires like their distant relations - the Dragons were too promiscuous, it was their downfall.
Mankind had figured that out in the 1940s after the war. You don’t think the United Nations was set up to stop wars do you?
They managed to get something from a monkey’s blood and found it turned their inside to sand, not right away it took about six months.

Six short sharp months.

Trouble was they didn’t know they had it until the fifth month and the way those guys root around it was plague city pretty quick.
The Vampires biggest problem was they gathered in clans and even though they socialized they kept matters to themselves so no one really cottoned on until the late 1980s and by then the damage had been done.
One of their biggest problems were the _Plague Johnnies_  - Typhoid Mary’s of the Vampire world, somehow unaffected by the disease but spreading it around at great rate of knots.

They almost impossible to trace because Vampires are creatures of habits that are very hard to change.

Flora had been at the party for hours, she was still disgusted by the fact that her kind still carried on like nothing was happening.
“For the undead we sure as hell try a lot of reproduction practice” she thought.
“Vampires addicted to blood and sex”.
Flora had been approached several times by both some rather stunning Males and Females but brushed them aside, which was their very good fortune. She had someone else in her sights.
Just when she thought she was wasting her time he came in through the front door, dressed as sharp as a razor with teeth and a smile to match. The teeth part not being a metaphor.
“Now that’s worth waiting for” she mumbled under her breath and made straight for him before she feared he’d be swamped by half a dozen other love sick vamps.
Flora sidled up to her prey being as forward as any of the People were when they expected something. He was quick to respond.
In usual Vampire fashion hardly any words were spoken before they were alone in a comfortable place and position.

“He doesn’t even remember me the bastard” thought Flora as they tore at each others clothes.
Flora in the tangle of bodies and clothing managed to jump on top and start kissing his chest all the time busily removing his trousers. When they were clear to his knees Flora started tongue around his groin and felt his hands on the back of her neck.
She hungrily put his penis in her mouth and felt him becoming more rigid with every down stroke of her lips then as she deep throated him she snapped her teeth like a vice around the base of his cock and tore it from his body in an angry animal like action.
Of course there was screaming and people burst into the room en masse to find out what the hell was going on.
Flora just lent over his chest and spat his cock onto his head as he lay in the fetal position whimpering.
She looked at the audience that had gathered and started to dress.
It’s not often you see Vampires shocked or stunned by an action.
“This is the prick who gave me and probably dozens others a death sentence”
She kicked the penis with the bloody stump aside.

“Say hello to our own little Plague Johnnie. It took a while but I found him. At least you can be safe in the knowledge he wont be spreading it around anymore”

With that she pushed through the crowd and left the room and into the night to await her pending death.

Thursday, 1 December 2011

Pulling the piss out of Pooh

Something I did a long time on redbubble.
Still makes me giggle.